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Staying Accountable Via The Blog

I’ve been thinking about the purpose of this blog for a while. Partly it’s just a dumping ground for my general musings, partly it’s a place I can go when I’m trying to remember the name of that good book I read six months ago. Partly it’s a way to look back on the year at the end of it, work out what went well and what didn’t, and plan the following twelve months.

But one thing a lot of people use blogs for is something I haven’t done so far: a way of staying accountable.  Continue reading “Staying Accountable Via The Blog”

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A Special Post For A Special Person On A Special Day

On March 4th 2014, my friend Jo killed herself. She wouldn’t have understood how much we’d miss her, because when you’re in that kind of state of mind you don’t get it.

I do miss her, though. If you’re thinking about killing yourself, you probably have people who will miss you too. They won’t even know before you die exactly which things they’ll miss about you. Some will be obvious, of course, but others not so much.  Continue reading “A Special Post For A Special Person On A Special Day”

Trees in the snow
Personal

Well holy shit, somehow it’s February

I haven’t posted since my review of Force of Nature on the 15th of January, which was a cheat post anyway because I wrote it last June. Before that I did my End of Year Reflections, plus a few other posts thinking about the year that had just happened and the one that was coming up.

Well, suffice it to say 2017 wasn’t exactly excellent. For the past few years I’ve adopted a Russian tradition of writing a wish for the upcoming year on a piece of paper, burning it, then tipping the ash into a glass of champagne and drinking it as I welcome in the new year. This year I didn’t get a chance to do that, but if I had then my wish would have been for the year to be better than 2017.

Continue reading “Well holy shit, somehow it’s February”

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End Of Year Reflections 2017

A couple of years ago my friend found a Buzzfeed list of questions to ask yourself at the end of each year, and they were quite good so I incorporated them into that year’s New Year party. Since then I’ve done a bit of reflecting on them myself, so here’s this year’s contribution. Continue reading “End Of Year Reflections 2017”

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A Year In Recap: 2017

Well, it hasn’t been the best of years. I’ve spent most of it heavily medicated, curled up in beds or baths at home or in hospital. However, there have been some highlights, and the extended period of time at home made me remember some stuff I’d forgotten, like how important philosophy is to me, and how much I enjoy spending time alone.

Continue reading “A Year In Recap: 2017”

Personal, Poetry

2017

the sights of 2017

the grey sofa covered in grey blankets, and grey me lying there greyly
half-stripped wallpaper
a purple laptop with flickering screen, nestling amongst white bedclothes
a piano covered in dustsheets
plants at the end of the bath, fronds dangling near my toes
the glaring bright of the bathroom light: an attack
my face in the mirror, a white death mask
hospital monitors
candle flames
and smoke rising from a cauldron.

Continue reading “2017”