Business, Forensicating, Freelance Life, Personal, Weekly Round-Ups

New Year, New Office, Same Old Me

I don’t really go in for “New Year, New Me,” partly because I think it’s probably futile and also because there’s not a lot about myself I’d like to fundamentally change. I do have some plans for the year, and a couple of things I’d like to do more of, but no resolutions as such.

Relatedly: I’ve been thinking about this tweet.  Continue reading “New Year, New Office, Same Old Me”

Weekly Round-Ups

How Do I Fit It All In? Six-Month Roundup

A few months ago, tired of people going “How do you fit it all in?!”, I started a blog series to answer that exact question. It was partly for other people but also partly for me; I wasn’t sure how I fitted it all in either. The answer used to be “I barely sleep” but these days I’m often in bed by 8pm, sometimes significantly earlier, so I knew it wasn’t that.

But apparently I still manage to live many lives and do loads of things. So how do I do it? This week marks week 21 of my ‘How Do You Fit It All In?’ series so I thought I’d go back through them and work out if there’s a direct answer to that question.  Continue reading “How Do I Fit It All In? Six-Month Roundup”

Weekly Round-Ups

How Do You Fit It All In? #13

The latest instalment in a series in which I answer the ongoing question “How do you fit it all in?”, which people ask me when I tell them what I do. Continue reading “How Do You Fit It All In? #13”

Business, Freelance Life, Investigation, Personal

“How Do You Fit It All In?” Like This.

People have always asked me how I manage to fit all the various things I do into my life. In the past, the answer was that I was a workaholic who could get by on four hours’ sleep a night.

Nowadays, however, I’m in my late twenties, and while that means I’m still young (right? RIGHT?!), it also means I’ve started making those little noises when I get out of chairs or bend to pick something up, and also that going to bed at a reasonable hour instead of stumbling drunkenly through the streets of Dalston at 3am seems like a perfectly good nighttime pursuit.

Continue reading ““How Do You Fit It All In?” Like This.”

Weekly Round-Ups

Pilgrimage Project Plans

This week I’ve decided to experiment with doing the weekly round-up on a Friday. Doing it on Sundays never quite happens, because… well… Sunday. And Mondays feel wrong, somehow. So let’s see how this goes.

Considering that the last one was posted this Monday, this is more of a three-day roundup, but I’ve managed to fit quite a lot into those three days.

Continue reading “Pilgrimage Project Plans”


Book Review: Rooms

Rooms(Not to be confused with Room, which is also good.)

The other day I hopped on a bus and went to meet a friend for dinner. Unfortunately she texted at the last minute to say she couldn’t make it, but being a true introvert this didn’t particularly bother me.

This meant that I had both (a) spare time and (b) spare money, which I’d budgeted for dinner. What did I do? Naturally, I took myself along to Waterstones.

I spent an hour and a half browsing the shelves, telling myself I was only allowed two books (the price of books these days almost equals the price of dinner, but books > food, so it’s fine). I went through several, starting with Eco’s The Prague Cemetery and Joanne Harris’ The Lollipop Shoes, both of which I inexplicably still haven’t read.

I realised whilst wandering though that Eco and Harris are both authors whose books seem to drop into my life of their own accord from time to time, and therefore maybe I should buy something I wouldn’t normally read. Something from an author I hadn’t heard of, for example, I thought as I absent-mindedly turned all the copies of The Rosie Project and The Rosie Effect to face forwards so that people would buy them (do it. They’re great.).

My eyes flicked over the shelves and alighted on Rooms. It had an intriguing cover, nice and dark, so I wandered over and read the blurb.

A compulsive and dazzling novel narrated by two ghosts that inhabit the walls of an old house. This isn’t your traditional ghost story, though. It’s about the living as much as the dead – and the secrets that haunt them both.

Hmm. Interesting. But it didn’t really give much away. It sounded good, though, or at least unusual; I often think that the ‘story told by someone who’s dead’ trope is a bit overdone, but this one seemed like it might be a bit different. And it was.

The Story 

Wealthy Richard Walker has just died, leaving behind his country house full of rooms packed with the belongings of a lifetime. His estranged family – bitter ex-wife Caroline, troubled teenage son Trenton and unforgiving daughter Minna – have arrived for their inheritance.

But the Walkers are not alone. Prim Alice and the cynical Sandra, long dead former residents bound to the house, linger within its claustrophobic walls. Jostling for space, memory and supremacy, they observe the family, trading barbs and reminiscences about their past lives. Though their voices cannot be heard, Alice and Sandra speak through the house itself – in the hiss of the radiator, a creak in the stairs, the dimming of a light bulb.

The Review 

I like any book that opens with a poem. This one opens with two: a good start.

There were lots of things I liked about it and I’m not quite sure where to begin. I suppose one of the main things was that it didn’t try to be more than it was. It could have gone down the flouncy-writing route (not necessarily a bad thing) and been all descriptive and haunting, but it didn’t. It remained as down-to-earth as a ghost story can be: telling the reader about the family who’d come to collect their inheritance, running through a fairly generic family-in-a-novel plot. Ex-wife who’s angry that ex-husband slept with other women, career-minded nymphomaniac daughter whose sexual escapades ruin her professional life, troubled teenage son who has no friends and wants to end it all. And of course, there’s Amy, the granddaughter, who watches everything that’s going on and applies to it her childish logic.

Then there were the ghosts. Again, these were nicely written because they were more like people than spirits; getting angry with each other, trying to keep secrets but also wanting to let them into the open. What I particularly liked, though, was the description of how being a ghost worked. They weren’t corporeal in any sense of the word, and some of the passages about how they drifted through the house, in some ways becoming it briefly before scattering again, were really well done. It’s how I’d imagine ghosts would actually be, if they existed.

On the whole, it’s a good solid novel that’s somehow more than the sum of its parts. I think because it’s sensitively written without being cloying, and Lauren Oliver spends just enough time on descriptions to make them interesting, but not so much time that you end up skipping pages of text (*ahem* Victor Hugo *ahem*).

Definitely recommended; dinner budget money well spent!



Interview with Nicci Gerrard

Nicci GerrardThe other day I read & reviewed The Twilight Hour, which is in the running for my Book of the Year 2014. It’s a wonderful, touching story, and you can read my review of it here.

I was therefore very excited when I was asked whether I’d like to interview Gerrard for my blog. I sent over some questions and she responded quickly and with characteristically excellent writing.

Q&A – Nicci Gerrard

Your new book, The Twilight Hour, is published under the name ‘Nicci Gerrard’, but you also write as one half of the duo ‘Nicci French’. What’s it like writing by yourself? What are the main differences and challenges of writing as a duo, and as a solo author?

I’d like to start by saying that I feel terrifically lucky to be able to have two voices – to inhabit two rooms inside myself.

Writing can be lonely and also scary – and sometimes a bit like going mad (and I write in an attic). Writing with Sean is less lonely, less scary, though not perhaps less mad. In many ways the actual process itself is remarkably similar, because when we are writing our Nicci French novels, we never write together; that would be impossible and also very quarrelsome. We still have to be alone, letting ourselves sink down into the work, letting go of self-consciousness. It’s the bits around the actual writing that feels very different. There’s the planning, which Sean and I do together over weeks and months, over coffee and tea and then wine, on long walks – on my own, I don’t have the same sense of ideas being confirmed and added to. I have to trust myself – to know when something will work and when it won’t. Then the editing and re-writing, and of course the aftermath of – the publicity, the readings, talks and interviews. As Nicci French, we can hide behind each other and protect each other. As Nicci Gerrard, there is no-one to hide behind. This is me: my voice, my words, my responsibility, my mistakes, my fault….. I feel much more vulnerable as Nicci Gerrard.

But I have an entirely different voice when I write alone, and it’s a voice I need to use.

twilightYour main character, Eleanor Lee, is presented as multifaceted and interesting, far more so than a lot of older characters in fiction. What was she inspired by, and how did you go about building her character?

Thank you – that means a lot because it’s what I set out to do from the start: bring an old, blind woman nearing her end to life in all her rich complications. And in fact there was a particular inspiration for the novel and to Eleanor. My parents are both alive but they are very old and very frail and vulnerable now. Two years ago, my siblings and I moved them from their family home into more practical house where they now have a 24-hour carer. My father was a doctor, and a private, courteous and kind man and he is now bed-bound and heartbreaking. My mother was (and still is) beautiful, and also boundlessly optimistic and adventurous; she is registered blind, has had cancer and several strokes, is very fragile. When we were packing their things away we found an old film of that we had converted to a disc that we all watched together at Christmas. It was of their wedding, over 60 years ago. There they were, so young, so hopeful, arm in arm and beaming at us. It was one of those moments which makes your skin tingle and your heart beat faster: very emotional and happy-sad.

We look at old people and often all we see is their age. But the old contain all the selves they’ve ever been. I wanted to create a character and give her her youth back as well, so that the reader sees the old Eleanor and the young at the same time. I wanted to have a woman who was still purposeful, caustic, passionate, guilty. I wanted the novel to swarm with old memories.

The novel touches on themes of loneliness and depression, but still manages to be an uplifting tale. Do you view yourself as an optimist in general?

I think I am – but perhaps a melancholy optimist, or even a self-willed optimist, if that makes sense. I don’t think everything will turn out for the best at all, and I’ve never believed that people get what they deserve and reap what they sow, but I do feel that even in the midst of sadness or loss, life can also be filled with great joy and kindness and you have to hold on to that. I think resilience is one of the most important qualities. Even when you’re lonely and depressed, you must put one foot in front of the other and move forward. And you should look at other people with compassion. There’s a wonderful quotation, attributed to Plato: ‘Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle’.

How did you manage to get the balance between writing about dark subjects and maintaining a note of positivity throughout the book?

Life is made up of small moments. The Twilight Hour is set in winter, in a desolate landscape; Eleanor is old and blind and near death and Peter is young and sad and lost. The novel is about guilt and betrayal and grief. But I allow them to help each other though these small moments. They drink tea together and wine together and she tells him a story. They give a shape to sadness. And they recognize each other. I think I believe in recognition much more than I believe in happiness – it’s why the kindness of strangers is so uplifiting. Also, they are both allowed to move forward. What’s depressing (and what characterizes real depression) is being stuck.

A bit of a classic question – tell us about some of your favourite books, or authors you find inspirational.

Where do I start! OK, with my childhood and all of the Moomintroll books by the great Tove Jansson. They are whimsical, mystical, lyrical and haunting little tales that I loved as a girl and read to my children over and over again (often through tears). I have also re-read Jane Eyre many times – the first time as a teenager, when I was completely captivated by the voice, apparently demure and yet so angry and assertive. It’s a great romance of course, and yet it’s also strange and wild and full of Gothic undercurrents. (I also love Wilkie Collins’ Gothic novels, particularly Woman in White and The Moonstone). Virginia Woolf’s To the Lighthouse and Mrs Dalloway and her diaries I return to, always with a sense of wonder that someone can write so wonderfully about tiny moments and with such elegiac beauty about time passing. Anna Karenina. Willa Cather’s My Antonia. The poetry of W H Auden and Louis MacNeice (I learn them off by heart and recite them loudly when on my bike). I think I have to stop there – and I haven’t even got on to any living authors…..

How did you get started as an author?

I always wanted to write, ever since I was old enough to read, but I never quite got beyond 3,000 word features or interviews until I met Sean when I was thirty and working as literary editor for The New Statesman. My marriage had just ended, I had two tiny children (a two- and one-year-old), was worried about everything, especially money, didn’t have much faith in men – and I somehow fell in love with him. We used to read each other’s work and we talked a lot about books and writing – we used to have a conversation about the possibility of two people making one voice. We thought that one day (when the children were older, and very quickly there were four children not two, when we had more time, more space, more money, more everything) we would try to write book together, as an experiment. Then we both came upon the idea that was the inspiration for our first psychological thriller, The Memory Game, and thought: if not now, when? So that’s how I started – as a collaborator, under a name that didn’t belong to me. Perhaps I needed that element of disguise to give me the confidence.

What advice would you give someone who wants to write and publish their first novel?

To write a novel: I’d say read a lot, and then I’d say, when you have the story that you need to write, start immediately. There’s never a perfect time, there will always be a reason to put it off. And try to find your own voice, whatever that voice is. Writing is a strange mixture of faith and doubt. Be self-critical but don’t be discouraged by failure: a large part of writing is failing to write, erasing what you’ve written, beginning again….

To publish a novel: well, you probably have to find an agent, since very few publishers accept unsolicited manuscripts now. Send a covering letter, a synopsis and the first few chapters to a suitable agent (look at novels in the same territory as yours and find out which agent represents them). Be dogged. When and if they say no, try again. And again.

The Twilight Hour comes out on the 23rd of October and is published by Penguin. You can pick up a paperback for £7.99; more details available on Penguin’s website.